Magazine Monster

In the ongoing quest to lighten my life load I am now tackling some really hard stuff.  The stuff that I have been facing lately is stuff that has hooks attached.
Emotional hooks.
Big barbed hooks.

Stuff that when we went through it the first and second time was still too hard to deal with and so got put aside for later.

You know that sentiment... I'll deal with that later.  We can manage to delay later indefinately if we try hard enough.  I am determinded to not just leave it that way.  So I am making myself face a little each week.

The fabric that I blogged about the other day has all gone now.  I gave some to a friend and the rest to another friend who is part of a group that does knitting and sewing for Brisbane's needy. So at least it has gone to a good cause.  It actually felt good today when I walked into the sewing room and it was empty.  It is the actual getting it out and making the decision to part with it that is the hardest part.

I still don't have an answer for the emotional hooks.  I keep asking myself all the practical questions:
Do I love it?
Is it useful or beautiful?
Did I chose to bring it into my life?
Do I need to it save it for tax or legal reasons?
If I needed it again later could I replace it?
If I were free from guilt would I keep it? - this is a very good question.
Have I used it in the last year? The last five years?
Does it fit with the vision of the life i want to lead?


These questions help to a large degree - they are not magic and it is still hard to actually part with the stuff with emotional hooks.  Once they are out of my life however it definately is better.  It feels better and the emotional load gets a little lighter.

I have to keep reminding myself of this fact.

Today's challenge is dealing with a large pile of scrapbooking magazines.

There is a lot of them and each is worth $10 although since I bought them with a subscription it cost me about $7 each.  It is a lot of money.  

As you can see many are still in their packaging, which confirms to me that I have lost interest in them.  I used to open then and pour over them marking ideas and making notes of things that I could apply to my own scrapping.  Now I just let them sit.  I don't get excited by them.  Mostly I just feel overwhelmed and pressured.   I have opted to avoid it by not even taking them out of the wrapping.  yeah I know, it doesn't avoid anything really.

I tried selling them on eBay. Even with them as a bargain, I didn't even get one watcher and no sale.  A friend has a stall at a flea market in a ccouple of weeks and I will be helping her so I will try putting them in a crate and offering them for $1 each.  If that doesn't move them then I guess I can drop them off at a charity. 

I have to keep reminding myself of all of the reasons to not keeep them and it is better to not even see them.  Perhaps I would be better off to just drop them off at charity now.  Hmm I'll box them up and put them aside so I don't have to see them until the market. yeay me.  No guilt allowed.

Her life in my Lounge

No it's not the name of yet another new reality tv show.  but it is a reality show of a sort...
Teen1 aka young adult is currently between homes.  Last weekend she moved out of her no-longer-suitable living arrangement and this coming weekend she moves into her new share house close to uni.  In the meanwhile she is staying with us for a few days and as you can see her stuff is in my lounge room.

She is currently trying to sort and do some decluttering of her own.

Tough decisions

My vow to declutter my life and free myself from excess has been quite transforming.  I have learned heaps about myself, have gained space and freedom.   Based on the wonderful gains, I promised to continue to declutter.  This has been somewhat mixed.  It is still freeing but it is in some ways getting harder.

I have already gotten rid of so much.  All the 'easy' stuff has gone and believe me it wasn't that easy either.  Now the really hard stuff is upon me and keeping it up is really hard.  In fact it is down right difficult.

The current 'for instance' is my sewing room.  I used to sew all of mine and my children's clothing.  Now I only sew pants for myself in order to get the right fit.  Sewing clothing is no longer fun.  I have given away most of my clothing fabric stash and got it down to four crates.  Yesterday I decided to tackle those four crates.  I have now got less than half a crate left of fabric I really love and will use.
Yeay Me!!!

Three empty (or soon to be empty) crates and some of the discards.

What to do with the contents of the other three and a half crates is where it is tricky.
I have already gone through my fabric at least twice and culled any that I didn't love or that were out of date or that my kids had outgrown or, or, or.  These four crates represent the stuff I have kept for one reason or another after all my culling.

Now is the time to really asses why I kept each piece and to decide if it still earns the priviledge of occupying space in my home and my life.  Surprisingly the first go through yesterday I still managed to pull out a fair bit of scraps, small-ish pieces and left over bits as well as a few pieces kept out of guilt.  All of them went into a bag to give away.

  See the fabrics in this pic? BTW they are balancing on the box of 'keepers' and as you can see it is only half-full. :)

All of these are full size pieces of lovely fabric - they just don't suit my life for one reason or another.  They all represent money spent - wasted if I never use them.  I know I need to just suck it up and get rid of them... but first I think I'll just torture myself for a bit.... yep that's what I am doing and it even sounds loopy to me.  so why do I do it???  ... ... ... nope, no decent answers coming. sigh.

I have considered trying to sell them on eBay to recoup a few dollars... there are over 10 000 pieces of fabric already on eBay in Australia alone, most of which are online fabric shops.  sigh - what chance do I have of actually selling them? I don't want the cost of an add (even if it is only a dollar or two) if they don't sell and I still have to end up just giving them away... that would only be wasting more money.

I tried to find a swap type of arrangement where I could swap it for things I actually could use.  I found heaps of craft swaps where you swap lovely completed items but nothing that is quite what I am looking for.  

So after they have sat for a few days and I rack my brain trying to come up with options, I will bag them up and drop them in a charity bin.  got any good ideas?

Work wonders

Things have been pretty hectic here in the last few weeks.  Between all the usual stuff, I have started the long process of returing to work outside of home.

I am feeling quite mixed about it. 

I am ready to return to work and there are some BUTs.

My perfect job would be three days a week in a middle management role where there were enough challenges to keep it interesting, but not so much as to be overly stressful, oh and it has to be something that I can just walk away from at the end of the day - ie not carry any emotional baggage home. 

yeah I know, I'm dreaming. 

Those jobs don't exist. 

Meanwhile I have applied for a few jobs and even had interviews with two companies.  I am now waiting to find out how the second company interview goes.  It is the fist company I applied to that gets my focus at the moment.

A couple of weeks ago I applied for a position some degree below my skills and qualifications.  It was full-time but it was close to home and would not ask very much of me personally - I could do it easily.  Yes I knew i would get bored within a few months, but I figured it would be an entry back into the workforce and I could either gain a promotion or leave for a better role down the track. 

I had two interviews for the position.  The first was over the phone.  I was asked why I was applying for a role below my skills. They must have like my response as I went through to the next round of interviews.  What I didn't tell them was that if I didn't like the job I would be continuing to look for something more suitable.  I guess they figured that out.  I was called in for an interview and spent 40 minutes with the manager.  He told me they were interviewing six people.  My interview went very well - excellent in fact.  He told me they would be making a decision within two days and would let me know either way by the end of the week. 

The interview was two weeks ago. 

I still haven't heard. 

How hard is it to make a simple phone call after interviewing a person twice to say "yay" or "nay" to the role???

We have got used to accepting the common rudeness of not hearing whether an application submitted has gone anywhere (and even surprised when one does hear).  But this new rudeness of interviewing a person and not bothering to notify them of whether they do or don't have the position?  Sigh.  It doesn't bode well.   

I have naturally figured that I don't have the job and am not bothered by that - kind of glad apart from I need a job. 

I am surprised at being told that I was one of six and would hear either way by a certain date and then no follow through.  Six phone calls surely isn't too taxing for a HR profession (whose job it is to make such calls). 

Are you ready for a giggle? 

The position was with a job agency whose role it is to recruit and place employees.  The role was to make the follow up phone calls to people who the agency has successfully placed to check on how they are going and to flag any potential issues - the agency only gets paid if the person stays in the role for 12 weeks.  Ironic.

Meanwhile I have been applying for roles closer to my qualifications and that means answering long position description criteria. 

Hair DIY declutter

Teen 3 decided it was time to declutter her head... well make it physically lighter anyway.

So here is a different kind of DIY.

BEFORE

Gorgeous girl and her long locks

... and the back view

AFTER

Happy teen

with short layered hair ...

... a funny uneven fringe.

and all the atittude of a 14 year old to carry it off.

She has had her hair every length from long (down to her butt) to short elfin style and every thing in between over the years.  changing her style is as simple as saying, "mum I was thinking I would like to have my hair like..." which is just what she did this weekend when she returned home.

No I am not a trained hairdresser.

But I have had much practice over the years.

I have my hubby to thank for getting me started and all those itchy, hairy experiences.

11 years ago on mother's day my hubby proudly presented me with a hair cutting kit.  !  We had just moved to a city at the opposite end of the country - 1700km away from our family and hubby's lifelong hair-dresser, his mum.  He figured that if she had been able to style their hair for all those years as a poor ministerial family, then so could I. !?

yes, I know.  The logic was a tad questionable.  His mother I am NOT.  and what about whether I wanted to take on the new role of hairdresser?  sigh.  We were poverty struck students and i had nothing to lose ... except for some hair, but hey, it grows back!

all that is water under the bridge as they say...  

Thus began my experience as a hair stylist.  

Thankfully my children were young and consequently had no idea how bad their hair really looked when I was learning.  The good thing about hair is it just keeps growing, so even a bad hair cut looks better a couple of weeks later.  Now many cuts later I am pleased to say that generally I am much better at cutting and styling hair.  

It amazes me how much my kids trust my ability - even as teens who are quite particular about how they look.  ... 'though now that I think about it, teen 2 has chosen to grow her hair long in the last few years, maybe all those bad hair cuts did leave a few scars.  ;)

In search of the perfect pants

I am very curvy.  Even back in the days when I was skinny I was still curvy.  Now I am NOT skinny and my curves are all the more pronounced.

I am told frequently that I have the ideal female body shape.  No one told the clothing manufacturers!  For a fat lady I have a tiny waist - yep and from there I go out.  My hips are quite wide and then there are my thighs.  I am sure I could make use of one of those signs that say "Wide Load".

By comparison the top half of me is still quite small. When I walk into clothing stores for larger sizes I get strange looks from the staff as they see the top of me first.  Whilst it has it advantages, it does have a down side too.

Getting clothing to fit is difficult to say the least.  I long ago gave up on even wearing a dress again.  There is a ten size difference between my top and my hip/thighs and there isn't a dress on the market that accomodates that kind of difference.  I can buy most tops in the regular size sections of a store, but this season all the tops are long line and I have the same problem then that I do with dresses.  Any that fit the top part of me are too tight for the bottom.  To get them to go over my hip/thighs they are soooooo baggy on the top that it just looks ridiculous. 

Pants get even trickier.

If I try on pants to fit my thighs - as I must, they are soooooo loose around the waist that they fall down and it is only my hips that keep them on.  In theory hipster styles should alleviate this issue.  sadly they don't.  The last thing I need is horizontal banding around my hips it just makes everything look really bad!  To further complicate it I am tall and have a long waist, so even the waist on pants tends to pull down and sit below my waist and pull in all the wrong places.

In the past I have tried many things to get round the pants fitting issue.

In the 80's there was a style of pants called "paper bag waist". Finally I was fashionable as all of my clothing looked like that anyway.  Lots of extra fabric pulled in at the waist with a belt; fabric gathered both above and below the belt.  I am not sure why that phase didn't last very long; possible something to do with it not being flattering or comfortable...

Darts are another much used option.  I got very good at adding darts to every pair pf pants that I bought.  I killed my first sewing machine trying to do just that.  It chocked on 16 layers of denim in the jeans that I was trying to dart.  yes waist bands are a problem for darts.  And of course even if one can successfully add darts to a finished pair of pants, there is still all that bulk to manage.

Elasticised pants are an option.  If the elastic is sewn down hovever it is of no help at all and we are right back at the darts dilema again, only this time the dart has to go through an elasticised band.

Long ago I concluded that I would just have to make my own pants and adjust every pants pattern.  I used to buy a pattern based  on my hip meansurements and make it up to see how it fitted.  then I would make adjustments to the pattern. Some years ago a dear friend did a drafting course.  The happy result from that was that for the fist time we were able to analyse each issue and design a simple pants pattern for my body.

Oh the joy.  For the first time ever I had pants that fit! 

Over the last 7-8 years she has made most of my pants based on this pattern.  Also over this time I have changed size many times.  Each season we would measure me and make any necessary adjustments to the pattern.  Sadly most of the adjustments have required the addition of more fabric to the pattern.

the pic below illustrates this well.

You clearly see where extra vilene has been added to the pattern.
You can also clearly see that when I lay something out on the floor, my cat Eddie thinks that it has been put there for his royal self and makes immediate use, taking possession and resisting all suggestions that his help isn't needed.  :)  just had to show you that.

"What you mean you don't want me to lay here and hold it down?"

I have been making pants again.

I am happy to report several things.
1. I am fitting back into pants that I havent worn for several seasons.
2. I need to trim about 3cm off each pattern piece.
3. I am very happy about both of these things! :)

So now I just have to convince the cat that I need to use those pattern pieces and I can make myself a pair of black cord pants to wear.

Teen 3's new room

Things have been flat out hectic around here in the last little while.

Over the last month two of our closest lots of friends have both moved house... hmmm both moved further away from us... what does this mean? :)

We had a great time (really!) helping both with the moving, doing whatever was needed.  Hubs even got to build a wall (and I forgot to take pics of it).  In amoungst the most recent house move our youngest teen went to live with one of our friends.  As I mentioined in my post yesterday it is much less travel for her.  Last weekend when she was moving in the two hubbies went off to the far side of the city to pick up some wardrobes that I found on eBay and our friends bought - old house not many built-in robes.  It turned out to be even better value than I had first anticipated as instead of getting two wardrobes and a tall boy, we got three robes and a tall boy.  yeay!

we took over a bed and mattress and two of the teens - both 14 sanded and painted it.
The dads had little faith in the teens abilities to manage power tools and to do a good paint job, and with only a little assistance from us mums our teens did a great job.

Yes, that's right.  It's now RED.  Very, very red.  Before it was bright blue with one red and one green drawer, all of which were chippy and looking very tired.

Our friends also surprised us with lovely new bedding for teen 3.

Here is the completed room with freshly painted bed (the drawer was still drying), crisp white linen and doona cover (my friends are braver than I giving her a mostly white doona cover), happy red bath towel with her name embroidered on it, shiny new silver-grey curtains, new (to us) robe and tall boy.  Yes even the grey carpet tones.

And the other angle standing at the end of teen3's bed - a cute black wrought iron edged mirror completes the room.
As you can see this was taken before she moved her stuff in.  I am sure that in a short while the walls will be deocarted with pics and the top of the tall boy covered in teen girl stuff.

In case you are wondering, the room measures 3.2m x 2.65m.  My friend and I sat with a piece of paper and worked out the only way to make every thing fit in the room. The incredible thing is that it all fits perfectly!  The robe door opens with about 1cm to spare and as you can see the bedroom door opens also with 1cm to spare. We are becoming very good at making small spaces work well.

Domestic Outburst!

Teen 3 is boarding with friends of ours who live much closer to the school.  Now it only takes her half an hour to get to school and she is home from school at 4pm instead of 5pm.  Our friends have four teenagers of their own and now - as of last week, they have five teens who go to three different high schools and all have to get out of the door early... oh and mum and dad both work in the city too.

I can only imagine how busy it is in their home each morning.  By contrast now ours is remarkably quiet with just teen 2 at home during the week.  I told teen 2 after we had dropped teen 3 off at our friends, that it was up to her to make all the noise now since the two noisy siblings have both gone (teen 1 aka young adult is off being independant).

In an attempt to contribute to our friends who have our teen 3 and for feeding their tribe school snacks, we got busy in the kitchen this morning.

Butterscotch biscuits

 Chocolate Choc-Chip Cakies

Butter Choc-chip Cakies

Yep and if all that productivetity isn't enough... pumpkin Rissotto done in the crock pot for dinner.

  Yummo.